One Umbrella Is Enough

We’ve all seen diagrams like this—the family hierarchy laid out under a series of umbrellas, topped with “Christ” and descending through “Husband,” “Wife,” and “Children.” I have seen this image floating around social media (apparently its origin is from Bill Gothard), and I have to be honest: it struck me as not only unhelpful, but also theologically confused.

Let me explain.

First of all: Why the extra umbrellas?

If Christ truly covers the family, then no other umbrella is needed. The protection, provision, guidance, and love we all need ultimately come from King Jesus. So putting additional umbrellas under His implies that His covering is somehow incomplete or that we need human intermediaries to trickle down His blessing or that we need the person above us to intercede on our behalf. 

That’s just not how the Gospel works. Under King Jesus, every member of the family—husband, wife, and children—has direct access to Him. His lordship isn’t filtered; it’s shared. One umbrella is enough.

Second, let’s talk about that word: “Biblical.”

Slapping the label “Biblical” on an image like this gives it a sense of divine authority. But let’s be clear: this is not a biblical chart—it’s a modern, Western, post-industrial ideal of how a family should function. Yes, some of the roles mentioned (like children obeying their parents) are clearly taught in Scripture. But many of the others? Those are inferences or cultural overlays, not explicit commands.

It is crucial to remember that the Bible was written to people living in a different time and culture than we do, and this reality means that we are to take the truth and information found in Scripture to give us the wisdom to live in our time and place. 

Not only that, but the image implies that these gender roles are taught in the Bible, but in Deuteronomy (for example), it is the father, not the mother, who is commanded to teach his children about God’s covenant. 

It is logical to assume that because men are naturally stronger than women (1 Peter 3:7) that they would have the role of protector, but we also know from real life that mothers play a role protecting their families. Ever heard of a “Mama Bear”? That’s not just a cute phrase, but a role that mothers take seriously. Consider the wise woman talked about in 2 Samuel 20 who saved her entire city from Joab and Israel’s army. She used her wisdom, not her strength, to serve as a protector of her people.

The Proverbs 31 woman reminds us that women played an important role in the providing for the needs of the family. In fact she was hard at work while her husband sat at the city gate. Providing for the family doesn’t follow on the shoulders of just men, it is a shared responsibility.

The reality: Every family looks a little different

Rather than trying to cram every household into a one-size-fits-all diagram, it’s more faithful to Scripture—and more honoring to the Spirit’s work in each family—to recognize that a well-ordered home is one where both husband and wife are using their God-given gifts, strengths, and passions to lead the family in following Jesus. The distribution of tasks may vary. Who leads prayer? Who handles finances? Who gets the kids to school? It depends. And that’s okay.

The goal isn’t rigid gender roles—it’s mutual submission to Jesus.

Colossians 3:17 — The Expectation for Disciples

The Apostle Paul gives us a better summary of what godly family life looks like:

“And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” —Colossians 3:17 (CSB)

If both husband and wife—if every member of the family—is living by this truth, then that household is honoring God. It’s not about how well we align with a chart. It’s about how well we follow King Jesus.

So let’s ditch the extra umbrellas. Let’s stop using “Biblical” as a weapon to enforce cultural preferences. And let’s get back to what truly matters: Following Jesus together as a family, in whatever shape that takes.

Paul’s Ponderings is a blog dedicated to reflecting on Scripture and encouraging believers to live out their faith with love and purpose.

Avoiding Worry

We’ve all been there. It’s late at night, long past bedtime, and you’re tossing and turning, unable to quiet your mind. You replay conversations, stress over bills, or fear what tomorrow might bring.

If you’ve experienced that, you’re not alone.

Researcher Lucas LaFreniere conducted a study on worry that revealed something staggering. Participants wrote down their nightly worries for a period of time, then returned 20 days later to see if those worries had actually come true. The result? 91.4% of what people worried about never happened.

LaFreniere explained it like this: “Worry makes you miserable in the present moment to try and prevent misery in the future… it sucks the joy out of the here and now.”

That hits hard, doesn’t it? Worry robs us of today’s joy over things that—nine times out of ten—won’t even happen. Jesus Himself asked, “Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” (Matthew 6:27). The answer is no. Worry doesn’t solve our problems—it just deepens our misery.

But here’s the good news: Jesus offers us another way.

Rethinking Worry

Too often, we treat Jesus’ words in the Sermon on the Mount (“Do not worry,” Matthew 6:25–34) as a command. We hear people say, “Worry is a mild form of atheism because when you worry, you’re doubting God.” That only makes us feel guilty—so we try to stop worrying, which ironically makes us worry even more.

But what if Jesus’ teaching wasn’t meant as a crushing command, but as a gentle reminder? Don’t worry, because your Father has things under control. The birds are fed. The flowers bloom. And you are more valuable than them all.

So, how do we move from worry to trust? John 6:15-21 gives us three principles that can help.

1. Refuel (v. 15)

After feeding the 5,000, Jesus slipped away to the mountain to pray. He had healed, taught, and fed thousands—He was physically and emotionally drained. Even the Son of God needed to refuel in His Father’s presence.

If Jesus needed that, how much more do we? Worry drains us, but prayer and Scripture refill us. Prayer connects us to God’s peace (Philippians 4:6-7), and His Word steadies our perspective (Psalm 119:15-16).

Start small. A short prayer in the morning. A verse taped to your mirror. Small, consistent practices make a huge difference.


2. Remember (vv. 16-20)

As the disciples rowed across the Sea of Galilee, a storm hit. They struggled for miles in the wind and waves until suddenly, they saw Jesus walking on the water. Terrified, they didn’t recognize Him at first—but then He said, “It is I; don’t be afraid.”

Here’s the truth: storms will come in our lives—health scares, financial stress, family crises. But when storms hit, we must remember: Jesus is with us. He promised, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5).

Even before the disciples saw Him, Jesus already saw their struggle. The same is true for you—He sees your storm, and He is coming to you.


3. Receive (v. 21)

When the disciples welcomed Jesus into their boat, they reached the shore safely.

That’s our call too—to receive Him. If you’ve never trusted Christ as your Savior, John 1:12 says that when you receive Him, you become God’s child. That’s the first step toward freedom from worry.

But for those who already follow Jesus, receiving Him means surrendering control. Too often, we grip the oars of our lives, exhausting ourselves with worry. But when Jesus is captain of the ship, He brings peace (Isaiah 26:3).

The Hope Beyond Worry

Let’s put it together. To avoid worry, we must:

• Refuel through prayer and Scripture.
• Remember that Jesus is with us in the storm.
• Receive Him as the one in control of our lives.

Here’s the big idea: Worry loses its grip when we focus on Jesus and the hope we have in His life, death, and resurrection.

This doesn’t mean life will be easy. Storms will still come. But instead of being consumed by worry, we can cling to hope—the hope that one day, King Jesus will return and make all things right.

So here’s a challenge: this week, when worry starts to take hold, stop and say: “God is good, and today is a blessing.”

Then pray a short prayer, releasing your worry to Him.

Corrie ten Boom, who endured unimaginable storms, once said: “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

Don’t let worry rob you of today. Jesus is here. He is enough.

Paul’s Ponderings is a blog dedicated to reflecting on Scripture and encouraging believers to live out their faith with love and purpose.

Loving Jesus and Bible Reading

Is it possible to love Jesus and still find the Bible hard to read?

That’s a question I pondered after I saw this quote on Facebook:

“A huge sign you lost the fire for Jesus is the Bible will be a chore to read.”

—Brent Williamson

I know what he is trying to say. He wants people to understand how important knowing Scripture is to being a disciple of Jesus, and I totally agree with that sentiment. Unfortunately, I cannot get on board with what it actually says.

Let me be honest: I hate this kind of thinking. 

I hate it, not because I doubt the speaker’s sincerity, but because it paints a misleading picture of spiritual formation. This quote suggests that if Bible reading feels like work, then something must be wrong with your faith. 

The sentiment behind the quote resonates with those people who love reading the Bible. They find the discipline of Scripture reading easy, and they routinely read through the Bible every year. 

This same thought is guilt producing for people who struggle reading or who find parts of the Bible dull or who have a busy life and anything more than a verse in a devotional book is difficult to do.

Then we have the reality that there are parts of Scripture that are a chore to read. They are hard to understand. They demand focus and effort. That doesn’t mean your fire has gone out—it might just mean you’re normal.

In fact, it might mean you’re growing.

Discipline, Not Just Emotion

Reading the Bible is a spiritual discipline. That word—discipline—implies something that takes effort, not just emotion. Our flesh resists it. The world distracts us from it. But out of love for Jesus and a desire to follow Him, we show up anyway. 

And that’s exactly what maturity looks like: showing up, even when the feelings aren’t there.

Think about other areas of your life. Doing the dishes isn’t thrilling, but you do it because you love your family. Folding laundry doesn’t light your soul on fire, but it’s an act of care. Likewise, opening your Bible when it feels hard or dry is an act of devotion. It’s a quiet “yes” to Jesus. It’s faith expressed through perseverance.

If anything, reading the Bible when it feels like a chore might be one of the clearest signs that your love for Jesus is real. Because you’re not doing it for a spiritual high. You’re doing it because He’s worth it.

Faith Isn’t Just a Feeling

One of the biggest traps we fall into is evaluating our faith based on how we feel. But faith is revealed not just by emotion—it’s revealed by action. Your commitment to read, study, and meditate on Scripture, even when it’s tough, is a beautiful expression of love and trust. Feelings matter, but they’re not the foundation. Obedience is.

This doesn’t mean Bible reading should always feel like a chore. There will be times when the words leap off the page and speak directly to your heart. But when those moments don’t come, that doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means you’re in a different part of the journey.

Remember: The Bible Was Written For Us, Not To Us

Part of what makes Scripture challenging is that it wasn’t originally written to us. It was written to people in a particular time, place, language, and culture. That means we have to work to understand it. 

Some passages don’t translate easily. 

Some metaphors don’t land clearly.

 But that doesn’t make them irrelevant—it just means they require effort.

Studying the Bible takes patience, humility, and the help of the Holy Spirit. It also helps to use resources—study Bibles, commentaries, and small groups—that bridge the gap between our world and the world of the text. That’s not unspiritual—that’s faithful study.

Fire Is Good, But Faithfulness Is Better

So let’s stop guilting people for struggling with spiritual disciplines. Let’s stop acting like feelings are the only evidence of faith. 

Let’s celebrate the quiet, faithful decisions people make each day to follow Jesus—even when it’s hard.

Fire is good. But faithfulness is better.

Reflection Questions:

1. Have you ever felt guilty for not enjoying Bible reading? Where does that pressure come from?
2. What helps you stay committed to Scripture when your emotions aren’t cooperating?
3. How can you encourage others who feel stuck or discouraged in their spiritual disciplines?

📬 Want more reflections like this? Subscribe to Paul’s Ponderings and join the conversation as we explore what it means to live faithfully in a world full of noise.

Comforted

Finding Comfort in a Restless World 

A recent survey of 2,000 Americans revealed something striking: only 21% of people experienced “true comfort” in the past 24 hours. On average, we only feel comfortable for about a third of the day—roughly eight hours. And how do people chase after it? A nap. A walk outside. A spa day. Setting the thermostat to just the right temperature.

The picture is clear: most of the world is looking for temporary comfort in fleeting ways. But Scripture points us to a greater reality. There is a source of lasting, unfailing comfort—our heavenly Father. Unlike naps or spa days, His comfort is not circumstantial.

This is the same theme we saw when walking through Nahum: The Justice and Comfort of God. Nahum 1:7 reminds us, “The Lord is good, a stronghold in a day of distress; he cares for those who take refuge in him.” The question is: How do we experience the comfort of God?

In 2 Corinthians 1:3–7, Paul gives us the answer. His comfort is more than a temporary relief—it equips us to endure, fills us with hope, and enables us to extend comfort to others.

Background: Paul and the Corinthian Church

Paul wrote this letter during a time of both joy and tension. Many believers in Corinth had been restored to fellowship with him, but some still resisted his authority. His purpose was to encourage the faithful majority, call the minority to repentance, and defend the nature of true ministry.

And what is true ministry? Not prestige or power—but faithfulness, endurance, and blessing others, even through suffering. That’s why Paul begins his letter with praise to “the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort” (2 Cor. 1:3).

Three Truths About the Comfort of God

1. The Provision of Comfort (v. 3)

Paul begins with blessing, not complaint. God is the source of compassion and “the God of all comfort.” The Greek word paraklesis speaks not of ease, but of encouragement, consolation, and strength to endure.

God draws near like a parent comforting a child. He comforts us through His Word, through prayer, through the Spirit, and through the church community.

But here’s the challenge: we must be willing to receive His comfort. Too often we isolate in silence. Sometimes God’s comfort comes in the form of a phone call, a text, or a coffee with a friend. Don’t cut yourself off from His provision. 

2. The Purpose of Comfort (vv. 4, 6)

Paul says God comforts us “so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction.” His comfort is never meant to end with us. It’s a conduit, not a cul-de-sac.

Paul’s afflictions—his painful visits, opposition, rejection—resulted in comfort for the Corinthians. Affliction, paradoxically, becomes a channel of blessing when it teaches us how to walk alongside others.

Think of sitting by a fire on a freezing night. The warmth is too good to keep to yourself. You naturally want others to come close. That’s what God intends for our scars and valleys—that they would become testimonies, warming others with the same comfort we’ve received.

3. The Power of Comfort (vv. 5, 7)

Paul reminds us that union with Christ means we will suffer, but we will never suffer without comfort. We do not experience the wrath Christ bore for us, but we do walk in His steps of innocent suffering (1 Pet. 2:21).

God’s comfort is not fragile. It sustains, shapes, and strengthens. Paul could have despaired under persecution, rejection, and prison, but instead he discovered that God’s comfort was stronger than any hardship.

When someone clings to Christ through loss, their testimony has power. Their comfort becomes living proof that God’s promises hold true.


Living This Out 

• Receive God’s Comfort Personally – Don’t rely on temporary comforts alone. Run first to the God of all comfort. 
• Extend God’s Comfort to Others – Be intentional in reaching out, sharing, and encouraging. Don’t hoard what God has given you. 
• Trust the Power of God’s Comfort – His comfort is durable. It carries you and equips you to carry others. 

A Story of Enduring Comfort

In 1962, missionary Alan Redpath suffered a near-fatal stroke that left him partially paralyzed. He later wrote:

“There is nothing—no circumstance, no trouble, no testing—that can ever touch me until first of all it has gone past God and past Christ right through to me. If it has come that far, it has come with a great purpose.”

Redpath’s life became a living testimony of God’s comfort, not because his suffering disappeared, but because God’s strength and mercy carried him through.

Big Idea

God is the Father of mercies. He comforts us, equips us, and calls us to comfort others—so that His love and hope never end with us.

Challenge

This week, ask God to show you the things you tend to run to for comfort. When you feel the pull toward temporary relief, pause and turn instead to the God of all comfort. Then ask Him to show you one person who needs the same comfort you’ve received. Be His vessel of mercy and strength.

Closing Thought

The world offers comfort that fades. But our God offers comfort that endures. Receive it, share it, and let it overflow—because His comfort never runs dry.

Paul’s Ponderings is a blog dedicated to reflecting on Scripture and encouraging believers to live out their faith with love and purpose.

Paul’s Radical Call to Love: Mutual Submission

Have you ever read a Bible passage and thought, That sounds a little outdated—but in the process you missed out on how revolutionary the thought was?

I think that is the case with Ephesians 5:21–33. On the surface, Paul’s words about wives submitting to husbands and husbands loving their wives can sound like they belong in another century. But if we could hear them the way the first Christians in Ephesus did, we would be stunned the new cultural standard the Apostle was setting for this group of Jesus Followers.

Paul wasn’t reinforcing the power structures of his day—he was turning them upside down.

Mutual Submission: A Shock to the System

Paul begins this section with a thought that would have stopped his readers in their tracks:

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (Ephesians 5:21)

In the Roman world, submission was what their culture was built on. We see this hierarchy laid out in the household code that he lays out following this sentence—slaves obeying masters, wives deferring to husbands, children doing exactly what they were told. We need to understand that the idea that everyone in the church should submit to one another was unthinkable.

If we focus on what Paul says about the roles found in marriage, he doesn’t undo them, but he reframes them. Wives are called to trust and respect their husbands “as to the Lord” (v. 22), this was not surprising. Within the larger Roman world, wives were expected to submit to their husbands. Wives submitting to their husbands was not counter cultural.

What was counter cultural is that husbands are called to love their wives “as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her” (v. 25). Paul spends time teaching husbands why this is important, because it was not assumed that husbands would love their wives. The husband’s responsibility was control. The Christian vision of marriage is that of mutual submission, and the way the husband submits to his wife is by loving her well.

It’s like a dance. The wife follows her husband’s lead, but his lead isn’t about control—it’s about sacrifice, like Jesus washing His disciples’ feet or dying on the cross.

Flipping the Household Code

In Paul’s day, philosophers like Aristotle had already written “household codes” explaining how the family should work. These codes always started with the paterfamilias—the male head of the household—who ruled over everyone. Wives, children, and servants were told to obey. The man’s job? Be in charge.

Paul starts in a way that sounds familiar—wives submit, husbands lead—but then he flips the script. Instead of telling husbands to simply “manage” their wives, he commands them to love their wives like Christ loved the church. That means sacrificial, self-emptying love. It means putting her needs ahead of his own. It means putting her needs and desires ahead of your own. It means doing what is best for the family. It means being willing to die for her.

In a culture where the man answered to no one in his household, Paul says: You submit, too. That’s not Aristotle. That’s Jesus. That is a radical and counter cultural teaching that we miss.

Why It Matters Now

We’re far removed from the Roman world, but these words still push against our instincts. Some people get stuck on “wives submit” and miss the weight of “husbands love.” Others bristle at the idea of submission entirely. But when we read Ephesians 5 through the lens of verse 21—mutual submission—it becomes clear: Paul’s vision is about love that gives, not power that takes.

Whether you’re married or not, the principle stands: In Christ, relationships aren’t about control, but about reflecting His humility. We serve each other because He served us first. We submit to one another because He laid down His life for us.

A Challenge

When you think about your relationships—marriage, friendships, church, workplace—what would change if you saw every interaction through the lens of mutual submission?

What if your first question wasn’t “How can I get my way?” but “How can I love like Christ here?”

This week, try it. In the moment when you want to win the argument, control the plan, or make the call—pause. Remember Paul’s words. Choose the path of humility.

Because in the Kingdom of God, greatness isn’t measured by how many people serve you—it’s measured by how willing you are to serve them.