July 17, 2006
Life is made more difficult when I lack integrity. It is not because circumstances will be more difficult (they might be), but because of the way I begin to feel about myself. I begin to feel like a fraud, a poser, and a hypocrite. Rather than living in the truth of God's promises (i.e. I am His child, I am a saint, I am a priest) I believe the lies of the Enemy. There is nothing that sucks the life out of me faster than believing that I am worthless scum.
To counteract this reality I need to do more than just change the internal dialogue I have with myself (which is important). I need to trust God and believe His promises. I need to live my life based on how God sees me. How does God see me?
One way I discover God's view of me is by reading the Bible. On the pages of Scripture I am able to discover that as a follower of Jesus I am a saint, I am a child of God, I am Christ's ambassador, and I citizen of God's holy nation. I discover that I have been forgiven and have been united with Jesus in his death and resurrection. I am also reminded that God has created me for a purpose, which means there is significance to my life.
If I am going to understand the way God sees me I need to pray. I can get the big picture when I read the Bible, but through prayer I can get the truth God has specifically for me. He can open my eyes to good that is in my heart, as well as the sin that continues to lurk there. He can affirm me in my obedience and warn me about my rebellion.
Through prayer I can also break the agreements I have made with the Enemy and the lies that I have believed about myself and the world. As long as I allow those agreements to remain I allow Satan to have foothold in my heart. It is through prayer that I am able to open my heart up to be healed.
If I could learn to life my life from the truth God reveals to me and walk in the healing He has brought to my heart, then my life will look radically different. I would have fewer regrets and more accomplishments. I would be able to feel good about who I am, rather than trying to hide behind a religious mask.